random stuff

Sooo sleepy today, almost fell asleep in the bathroom. Now that's bad.lol Stayed up too late last night. Me & Jeff had a project.

We built me a new desk, the one I had was falling apart & it just want't working. It sounds redneck as hell, but its quite practical. 8 crates, fastened together, 4 on each side, creating 8 storage cubbies, & MDF across the top. Eventually I'll put laminate countertop on it & spray paint the crates the same color & attach it to the top with large bolts.

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Managed to hurt my shoulder again, the rotator cuff thingy, Id hurt it awhile back & reinjured it I guess. DId a lot of yard work, weedeating, mowing, weeding by hand & cleaning up the front quite a bit. Also got the pool started draining, moved some crap around in the back yard & helped jeff load the now broken big screen tv into the truck-which is now being serviced-pray for it.lol

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work is.............bleh, I sooo dont want to be here. JUst dont see things getting much better.

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Jeff is going to rebuild my machine, make it a little faster. YAY

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Abigail has decided she wants to play the violin. WHile I love the idea of one of my children becoming a musical virtusos, I also know my child & she hates doing any kind of work.lol This is going to be a challenge, I hope she enjoys it at least, that will make the whole year go smoother. I cant wait to see her progress & hear her play . Of course, the screeching that comes with learning, hmmmm, may get some earplugs.

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saturday is a full moon, im going to make a point to be outside that night, rain or not, IM getting back to what I need to do.....

I've been experiencing spiritual burnout & it occurred to me why. several reasons really, 1- Im not making myself get out there 2- IM allowing other things to get in the way of doing it & not making it a priority. 3-Im not supposed to be publicly 'out there'. IM just not very comfortable around groups of people, with the exception of Glorias groups. I feel at ease at those, used to feel that way about esbat, of course, im so out of that now, itd be hard to get back to it.We'll see. for now, Im gonna make it a point to do 'something' each day, if only for 5 minutes. & to mark the special days as they should be, by myself, may involve the girls as time goes on & im more into it again.

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about to embark on the 2nd half of the 'carpet sucks' project.

time to get rid of all the staples & paint the floor. going to go with a deep brown color, hope it looks as good as it sounds in my head.

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Well.......

I sincerely try to keep this blog upbeat but sometimes I don't write because my mood is down. Well, maybe that's a mistake. I'm quite upset today, maybe I shouldn't be but it bothers me.

the girls @ work were talking about some other person, a former coworker, referring to her weight, she short & heavy, which makes her seem twice as big as she is. They were talking about how bad it is, which is true, health wise, then it went to cracks about how she looked. Hmm, some friends. Mind you, one of the friends is overweight herself. She's taller than the aforementioned lady & I, but nevertheless, at least 80 or so overweight. I myself am about the same, but being short, it looks worse on me than on her. & oh yeah, she had a month or 2 where she did weight watchers & lost about 20-25 lbs. Well, good for her.....

Anyhow, the cracks went on for a moment & I sat here, conscious they could also refer to me. I said aloud " Thanks _____". & she said "Well its true. You are what you are"

Ummm, yeah, thanks for the reminder that IM fucking fat. I'd almost forgotten you know. What would I have done without your reminders. AS IF I could ever forget.

Am I over sensitive?

Doesn't help that I'm just getting back into dieting & going back to the gym & working out. FUck, I'm TRYING.

Tokyo in Tulsa

SO I said I was tokyo'd out. I was wrong. We went back on Sunday for the final day of the convention. I actually had a pretty good time. Not only did Kayla & I go, Abi went, & Kayla's BFF Valerie went too, & Zane, my stepson showed up as well. Tried to get some cash to buy Abi some of her beloved Pocky, but the ATM was down, so we trekked to 5th & Main to the bank to get cash. BLEH, it was over 100 .

WHEn we got back, Zane had arrived, so we trekked around awhile, then the kids all started lining up & did whats called a 'caramel dance' line. They were having a blast, up the escalator, down the hall, zigging in & out of room, down stairs, out the building, around the corner, down more stairs, in the main doors, up the escalator again, zigging thru more room, back down the escalator & up again, round & round it went. I captured a little video on my phone but the quality blows. :(

Im hoping something else shows up on youtube. If anyone else has photos or videos, shout out to me.

All in all, there was a great time had by all. The con staff, directors, vendors, hotel staff & everyone involved were great! I am actually looking forward to the next one (next time Ill wear better shoes to walk in!)

tokyo'd out

I have spent most of today & half of last night at Tokyo in Tulsa, an anime convention. Why am I here?
My 13 yo daughter is in love with anime. She eats, sleeps & breathes it. Shes also volunteering to get in for free. Ive sat in on some things with her, but Ive spent most my time here online, on my laptop, watching the people walk by. Majority of the corwd is in full costume, or in partial costume. All kinds & colors of hair, fake weapons, kimonoos, weird robes,short dresses, striped tights & socks, its unreal. Some are just downright scary.
But shes having a blast & that what I care about.